Wisdom on Wednesday

"If you judge people,

you have no time to love them."

~ Mother Theresa

 

 

I love this quote.

 

Which reminds me of a group of people

that I didn't mention in yesterdays post...

 

Kyle and I were sitting in an empty

tram car ~ well, empty except for us ~

when a group of boisterous, excited,

(a little loaded) "Frat Boys"

boarded the tram.

There were at least 15 of them.

I counted 7 of them carrying twelve-packs

of various varieties of beer.

They were passing around a long-neck bottle of beer.

 

One "Frat Boy" sat next to Kyle. 

As the bottle was being passed his way,

Kyle reached for it.

The "Frat Boy" smiled, and said,

"Uh,uh,uh, you are too young Dude."

Kyle giggled, and the "Frat Boy"

talked to Kyle the rest of the way to

the next station.

 

We reached the station and the

"Frat Boys" went tumbling merrily on their way.

I found it extremely touching,

that as each left the car, they

smiled and waved to Kyle.

"Bye Dude", was a much heard refrain.

 

People can be so good.

 

Take the time to SEE and love those around you.

If all you can give is a smile.

That will be enough.



People

I was very vocal yesterday in my opinion of

Las Vegas ~ it's not my favorite place.

But let me say something about people.

 

We have encountered some incredible people.

 

During our time here, as in so many instances,

we have found people who are kind, considerate,

and sort of melt when Kyle is around.

 

We saw the "Tournament of Kings" show,

at the Excalibur Hotel/Casino.

It was fantastic.

Kyle was a little bit nervous, as he often

is in new situations, a very nice man named,

Jason, came over to talk to Kyle.

Kyle wouldn't answer, so he started talking to

"the hubby".

Jason is from New Zealand.  His uncle

has Down syndrome.  We learned that his uncle is in

his 60's and his (Jason's) Grandma is in her 90's.

He hypothesized that it's because she doesn't want to leave his uncle.

We talked for quite a long while.

It was so very nice...

...we met another member of the "club".

Down syndrome draws people together.

 

One day of our stay, we went to lunch

at an Irish Pub Restaurant.

Kyle ordered "fries".

I asked the waitress if she knew where, within walking

distance, I could go to find a loaf of white bread.

One of Kyle's mainstays is white bread.

She was so kind.

She brought us a loaf from the restaurant kitchen. 

No Charge.

A very nice gesture to make one boy's life better.

 

Today we rode the tram between hotels,

people were so kind. 

Grinning at Kyle's antics on the tram and

always wishing him well.

 

People can be so kind.

People can be so compassionate.

People, given the chance, see a "stellar spirit"

and choose to respond with softness and smiles.

 

I am always grateful for those who,

with no knowledge of us as individuals,

take the time to choose kindness.

 

People can be so good.

Travel

Travel.

It's tiring.

Hurry up to sit and wait.

 

It amazes me that we can board an airplane

and in 2 1/2 hours cover the distance that would

take nearly 20 hours by car.

 

 

And we can drive in 20 hours the distance it would have taken

the Pioneers weeks to travel.

 

We left our home in the Northwest

and traveled to the desert.

Las Vegas --

It's brown.  You can see for miles!

The land is not flat, but it appears much more flat than

what we are used to....there are palm trees instead

of evergreens.  But you can find beauty wherever you look for it.

 

Las Vegas

reminds me of

Pleasure Island in the movie

"Pinocchio".

 

People come they leave reality

and get lost in whatever they choose to find

and pretend that real life doesn't exist.

They come, they play -- some turn

into jack-asses -- and then

they go home and pretend it never happened.

It boggles the mind.

At least my mind.

We've done a few fun things....and it's fun to be together.

I will be just as happy to leave.

 

Travel.

It can be so fun.  So tiring.

And when you get home...

...you can rest.

Make a Difference Day

The last Saturday of October is

Make a Difference Day

and

National Forgiveness Day.

 

 

So what will you do today to make a difference?

 

Lots of times we think that it requires

grand gestures to make a difference.

Sometimes it's the small things that

have a great impact.

 

Smile.

At everyone.

 

Compliment someone's shoes.

 

Say "I Love You."

 

Send a Thank You note.

 

Not all acts that make a difference are

big and life-changing for many people around you.

But a small act,

just might be life-changing and huge in the

life of one person.

Notice others.

That makes a difference.

 

And while you are making a difference....

forgive someone who has hurt or offended you.

That way -- you've made a difference in your own life.

Forgiveness sets us free.

 

Make a difference today in someone's life

and you will make a difference in yours too.

Neighbors

How does that scripture go again?

 

"Love thy neighbor as thyself."

 

That's the one!

 

Why, OH Why,

is it so hard to do?

 

In the "generic" sense,

you think,

that's not so hard.

But then....

your home is sold,

you move into "interim" housing

and your new neighbors move in

six weeks after you do.

They complain about you the

VERY FIRST NIGHT!

And the complaints just continue

piling up.

"You're noisy"

"You stomp at all hours of the day and night"

"You do laundry at 5:00 a.m."

"You woke us up at 2:30 a.m."

 

Oh,

and they don't speak to you,

they speak to the ladies at the Leasing Office

who then convey the complaint to you.

 

First your mind catalogues

(okay my mind -- cause this has been my life)

all of the reasons that they are wrong.

First --
"I'm not even awake at 5:00 a.m."

"They were already awake and smoking at 2:30 a.m."

"You live in AN APARTMENT, there will be noise!!!"

 

The complaints continue.

The Leasing Agents are frustrated.

We are frustrated.

They are frustrated. 

 

Then I start to think how it would be if
we lived downstairs. 
Maybe they are sensitive.

Maybe I should be kind.

Maybe I'm judging them harshly.

Maybe they should be thankful

that we don't have 4 children,

aged 4 to 9 years-old,

running around....

Maybe they should be thankful that there

aren't more teenagers here.

Maybe they should be thankful we don't have

2 or more DOGS!
Wait!  Wait!  Wait!
I was trying to put myself in their shoes...

 

Maybe I should be kind!

Maybe I should love my neighbor as myself.

Because....if it were me....

(I think I've discussed that before)

I wouldn't want the noise.

I wouldn't want to feel unhappy all the time.

I would want to enjoy the space I pay for....

 

My neighbors aren't so different from me,

are they?

 

The Leasing Office determined that the floors

would need to be stabilized in order

to alleviate the noise level.

 

For the past two days,

we have moved furniture,

had workers here, pulling up carpet

drilling screw into the sub-floor and joists.

Joe & Gabe

fixing the floor.

It was quite a process.

They drilled right through the vinyl...

After they found the joists, they drew lines,

and drilled away.

The rest of the house they had to pull

up the carpet and complete the process.

I was thankful that there were a few things we

didn't have to move.

 

To say that I was dubious about this process

making a difference in the creaking floors,

is an understatement.

However,

it worked!

The floors no longer creak!

That is not to say that the neighbors won't still

hear us moving around occasionally.

There was no sound-proofing done.

We still live in an apartment.

I'm not confident that the complaints will stop.

 

But we tried everything we can to

change the situation.

 

Today the carpet layers came

and fixed the carpet and put in new

vinyl....it looks like wood.

This is the new vinyl.

I LIKE it!

 

I was trying to be kind,

but alas I couldn't completely pull it off.

The neighbors were gone all day

yesterday -- when the drilling and such happened.

We were here all day to move the furniture.

Today, while the carpet layers were here,

the neighbors were home.

Each time they pounded and bumped the

carpet into place, I sort of rejoiced

that the neighbors were sharing our pain.

I secretly hoped that they went

to complain to the Leasing Office

about the noise.

 

I am a work in progress!

I really want to be kind and

"love my neighbor",

but sometimes it's harder than others.

Believe me, I've had conversations with God

about this....and He is patient with me, because

He loves the neighbors too! 



Technical Difficulties

We have had "technical difficulties"

with our cable, Wi-Fi, and telephones

for the past few days.

To say it's been frustrating,

is putting it mildly.

 

Thank goodness "the hubby"

speaks geek

(no offense)

and understands the ins and outs

of the modems, gateways, splitters,

and such.

I was lost just listening to him.

Thank goodness he knows the questions to ask,

the way to set things up,

and how to get my internet working again.

 

It amazes me how dependent I am

on technology.

I was pretty lost for the past few days.

Couldn't check e-mail, Facebook,

Blogger....

Couldn't look up random information

when a question came to mind.

20 years ago, when I was working at the hospital,

they were in the beginning stages

of "rolling-out" e-mail to employees facility wide.

How did we get along without e-mail?

Oh yeah, telephones.

We spoke to people, left messages and

hoped that they would call us back.

It worked....but e-mail is amazing!

 

I'm so thankful for technology.

I don't have to understand HOW it works,

to be grateful that it DOES work and

that some people do understand it

and can make it work for me!

 

Enjoy your day...

....I will be enjoying mine...

answering e-mails!

Truth

Yesterday at Church I taught

the Sunbeams in Primary.

 

If you aren't familiar with Primary,

it's specifically for children ages 3 to 11.

It's sort of like Sunday School,

except that there is a time frame where

the children meet together and have

a short message, greet visitors, celebrate birthdays

and sing.

Then they are excused to a class time which

is where a gospel related topic is taught.

 

The Sunbeams are three turning four years-old.

They are so cute and sweet and candid.

 

There were eight in my class,

and I had a friend come and help me

because teaching eight four-year-olds is a little daunting,

and I was just a substitute teacher. 

 

We got to our class time,

had a snack, and then it was time

for the lesson.

Each child was sitting in their child size chairs.

I said, "I need to get a chair, cause I'm little too."

One little boy, named Jack, said,

"No you're not ~ You are OLD!"

 

OUCH.

Okay, I'm old.

In fact to these children

I must appear ancient!

 

Truth is truth.

To them I am old.

Just like Irene Wilding was old when I was

a little girl.

And when I was a young mom with three children,

and lived next door to her,

she was older still.

And I loved her, because she first loved me.

 

Our lesson was on honesty.

I asked, "What does it mean to be honest?"

"Don't steal." yelled Jack.

"Tell the truth." said Izzie.

Both very true.

We made headbands that said,

"I can be honest."

Jack said, "I can't wear this,

headbands are for girls."

I told him it was more like a crown.

Later he told his mom,

"See my crown?  It says 'Don't Steal'."

 

Truth is truth.

Even when it hurts.

 

Truth doesn't change.

We can feel when something we've heard or seen is true.

We can't bend truth to fit our whims.

We can act against what we know is true,

but it doesn't change the truth.

 

Seek truth.

Live truth and you won't lose yourself.

 

Truth is truth.

Becoming a Mom

25 years ago, today,

I became a Mom.

I thought I was ready to be a Mom.
I love my boys.
But with the distance of 25 years,
I realize how woefully unprepared I was.

I wasn't prepared to cherish the moments.
I wasn't prepared for how quickly time would pass.
I thought there would be time "tomorrow"
to slow down,
to remember each milestone,
to build and praise.

From this distance,
I know I did my best at the time.
I wish I could get that time back and do more,
be better at treasuring each one of them.

I look back through the pictures
and remember the years
and know that the best thing
I have ever done,
is become a Mom.

No other work in this world can
compare to being a Mom.
It's not easy.
It will never end.
You can't "end" love.
I know I sometimes do things that annoy
my children, but I tell them...
"I will never stop being your Mom."
and I smile.

I am blessed to have the boys
 ~ now men ~
who call me Mom.

Thank you Derek
for making me a Mom.
Happy Birthday Baby!

Stellar Spirits

Stellar Spirits.

What does that mean?
To me, it means a spirit
so pure,
so enormous,
so beautiful,
and
so close to God,
that in order for us to
recognize them for who they are,
they were set apart.
Perhaps it's what the world sees as imperfections,
that allow us to really look at them,
to truly see them,
to allow ourselves the time
to feel of their spirit,
~ their love ~
to allow God to touch our hearts
through them.

When we open our hearts and our lives
to such spirits,
we are the ones who are changed.
We are the ones who grow in love,
in compassion,
in recognizing the wonder,
the splendor,
and the hand of God in our lives.

We do not change those with
stellar spirits,
they change us.
They change our hearts and our souls.

Open your life to someone with a stellar spirit
and you will never be the same.


Wisdom on Wednesday

"When the chips are down,

The buffalo is empty."

 

Think about it....

Today is
National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.

Losing a child,
at any age,
has to be a most wrenching and grief filled time.
Losing that child before they become part of your life,
or just as they make their appearance is a most
empty and lost feeling.

To those who have endured this in their lives,
know that God is aware of you.
We don't always know or understand His plan.
We pray for your comfort, for you to find peace in Him.

Remember those who have loved and lost
before they've been given the chance to really know their baby.
Reach out with compassion and love.



Value

Every life has value.

 

 

I love this quote:

 

"Children value themselves to the degree

that they have been valued."

~ George Durham

 

I love how our older boys

love and adore Kyle.

 

Just a few photos....

Kyle has brought us increased love...

...helpfulness....

....care....

....enjoyment....

....contemplation...

...and made us all better.

 

Every life has value!

Disability is a small thing,

compared to the joy brought into our lives

by one little guy.

 

Find the value in ALL those around you.



Special

When Kyle first came into our family,

people would stop me to

look at the baby,

as people often do.

When they realized he has Down syndrome,

the response often went something like this...

"Oh, you must be SO special for

God to have given this baby to you."

 

I hated that sentence.

I wasn't special.

I didn't feel special.

I felt overwhelmed at times.

I felt worried and afraid that I wasn't equal to the task.

That I couldn't be enough to give this child a great life.

All I had was love.

Before he was born, to my shame,

I worried about whether I could love this child like I loved my other two.

The moment I laid eyes on him,

I fell head~over~heels in love,

and he became just a baby.

My baby.

The baby of our family.

 

I love this thought that I came across awhile ago,

there was no credit given for an author,

but it sums it up perfectly.

 

"God doesn't give children with special needs to strong people;

He gives children with special needs to ordinary, weak people and then gives them strength.

Raising a child with special needs doesn't take a special family,

it makes a special family."

 

I couldn't say it better.

I am not special.

I am not different.

Kyle makes me a better mom.

I have learned that I can be patient.

That little things don't matter.

I've learned so many things that I couldn't have learned without Kyle.

 

Kyle ~ blessing day July 1994

 

He is special ~ and I,

I am special by association.

Derek, Kyle, Scott ~ May 1995

 

He is special ~ and we,

as a family ~ are special because

without Kyle we would be lost, and

he helps us be better

than we would otherwise be.

 

Every individual ever born is special,

unique and important.

Those with "special needs" require that

we love more, slow down a little and

see the world, and others around us.

Those with "special needs" remind us who we are,

and help us become who we should be...

~ Someone Special ~



If It Were...

Let's face it...

we all do it...

we all judge others and their choices.

This judgment, couches our opinion,

and tries to convince others,

that our way is the best way.

 

It generally starts...

"If it were MY..."

 

I wrote this letter in response to the

overwhelming..."If it were my child..."

That I was getting from a school district,

in 1999. 

Is this still relevant to the discussion today?

Maybe, maybe not....but here it is...

 

********************************************

 

"If It Were MY Child..."

 

Parents all over the U.S. are hearing this phrase in connection with their child who has a disability.  Educators, from bigoted professors at prestigious universities to small, local pre-schools, are saying it.  Health care providers, from physicians to tech support are saying it.  Friends and family are saying it too.

 

"If it were my child...I'd have an abortion and get rid of the problem before IT becomes a problem."

"If it were my child...I'd put him in an institution and forget about him."

"If it were my child...I'd want her to be 'with her own kind'."

"If it were my child...I'd want to make sure he was in a class where he was closer to the same level as the other children."

"If it were my child...I'd find a really good sheltered workshop."

 

Would you please listen to yourselves?  You might as well say what you really think:

"If it were my child...I'd want to snuff out his life before I had the chance to know him."

"If it were my child...I'd put him away where there was absolutely no chance for him to learn or grow. 'You bet, I'd definitely want him where no one I know would ever see him.  I mean, really, what an embarrassment."

"If it were my child...I'd want her in a school room where she could never see or hear 'typical' children, because they'd know she's different, and heaven help us, she might start to act like 'them'."

"If it were my child...I'd never expose him to the joy and wonder of learning, of stretching and growing. I'd never expect anything of him because obviously he'd never be able to accomplish anything anyway."

"If it were my child...I'd get her a job she hates, that does not interest or challenge her to and make her go everyday.  She doesn't need to feel productive."

 

Is this what you truly believe, that because a child has a disability they cannot be a productive part of society?  That because a child has a disability he should be segregated from 'typical' children and then hidden away for their entire adult lives?  Is this truly what you would want for your child?  Take a moment and really stop to thing about what you are saying, and then ask yourself, if it were MY child, is this really what I'd want?

 

If it were your child you'd want what we want.  We want choices for our children.  We want them to be welcomed into classrooms and not have to earn the right to be there.  We want professionals to realize that while they may have theoretical expertise, we, the parents, are the true experts on our child.  We live with them we see their abilities, their growth, and the possibilities for their life.  Possibilities that are limited by professionals who want their word to be "law" and don't want parents to question their decisions...even if the decision is wrong for the child.  If it were your child, you'd question and disagree too.  Too many times educators and health care workers see only the disability.  They fail to see the child and the limitless abilities the child has.  Please realize that our children are children first, and yes they may have a disability, but disability is not the only thing that defines them.

 

Our children need to be educated.  They need to be educated with their friends and neighbors, the children they to church with, the children they play with after school, the same children they take swimming and ballet lessons with, or who are on their soccer team.  'Typical' children see children with disabilities and accept them, learn to care about them, watch out for them, and usually fail to see the disability.  'Typical' children will grow up and enter a diverse world where not everyone has the same talents and abilities, likes and dislikes.  They won't work with all the same 'kinds' of people, why is school any different?  Acceptance of diversity at a young age negates fear and prejudice.  Isn't this, a lack of fear and prejudice, what we want for all children?

 

Our children need health care that is thorough, competent and free of prejudice.  If our child needs glasses, we want them to have glasses, without your editorial comments about how 'glasses won't make him smarter.'  If our child needs a wheelchair or walker or communication device, we want our child to have them.  Our children need every apparatus, and every piece of assistive technology that will allow them to be more free and independent.

 

"If it were my child"...an oft heard phrase.  Guess what?  This is my child!  I have hopes and dreams and expectations for my child...just like you have for yours.

This is my child...and I chose to have him and to love and cherish him.

This is my child...and I want him to be educated with his neighborhood friends.

This is my child...and I want him to work at something that interests and challenges him, and do something he enjoys.

 

Aren't these the same kinds of things you want for your children?

So, don't give me your opinion and impose upon me what you think you'd do for your child, because if the situation were reversed, and it were your child, your thinking would change, your expectations and acceptance of abilities would change,

In fact, your entire perspective would change and you'd want the best for your child too.

 

~Copyright 1999

All Rights Reserved~

 

*********************************************

 

It sounds like I was angry and indignant.

I was!

 

Shortly after I wrote this, our family relocated.

Our experience here has been light years apart

from the frustration of trying to include our child

in his neighborhood school. 

In our new home, he was accepted and welcomed,

loved and his needs were put first.

 

However this is still a problem in many

areas.  Many parents still feel this frustration

and need our support.

 

The next time

~ in whatever setting ~

you find yourself saying...

"If it were...."

Stop.

Ask yourself,

"Is that really what I'd....

or if the role were reversed, would I...

something different?"

 

Think about it.



Wisdom on Wednesday

"The people conventional wisdom

deems insignificant

are often the most

influential and necessary

people in the world."

~ Toni Rossi

Conquer Fear

I saw a post on a social networking sight

that said,

 

"Kindly modify your behavior and stop staring,

Down syndrome isn't a choice."

 

I'm not going to tackle the

"isn't a choice" statement,

because for us it was.

 

What I want to say is this...

...don't stop staring...

but if you're curious,

conquer your fear and

ask your questions.

 

In my experience,

people stare because they are curious,

but are too afraid to approach

and ask questions.

People stand back and don't

engage, because they are afraid.

This is across the board,

and not limited to disability, it

encompasses cultures and races too.

 

When a member of your family has

Down syndrome, you are

admitted to an exclusive club.

You are bonded to others who live with

Down syndrome.

Smiles are exchanged,

you have something in common to

talk about....and you make new

friends because of your shared experience.

Others don't have that bond

and when they stare ~ it's generally fear that holds them back.

 

Be tolerant of those who stare,

they are just afraid.

Smile.

Engage them.

Ask them questions, and allow them

to ask their questions.

 

Fear goes both ways.

We see people stare and think the worst of them,

we are afraid to engage them.

They are afraid to ask questions,

but they stare because they are curious.

 

Down syndrome

may or may not be a choice,

but fear is...

Choose to conquer fear.

Believe

What is one of the most important things you can give a child?

 

Your belief in them.

Belief in their talents,

their dreams,

their abilities.

As you meet the needs

of your individual children,

you validate who they

are and who they

can become by believing in them.

 

Children with disabilities

are often discounted.

Schools systems and the people

in them doubt the

need for them to be

included with their

more "typical" peers.

 

When Kyle was transitioning from

early intervention to the Special Needs Pre-school

(he was ALMOST three years old),

a school psychologist came to our

home to review the results of the test she had given Kyle.

She sat in my living room,

and with a look of contrived sympathy,

and a hint of superiority in her voice,

said to me,

"Kyle scored the lowest of anyone I've

ever tested on the I.Q. test."

She then gave me a number ~ which I don't remember ~

then asked,

"How do you feel about that?"

 

I looked her in the eye and said,

"Your test does not reflect my child.

All it shows are the things he refused to do for you.

Does it show that he can run the VCR (yes, back in the day) better than I can?

Does it tell you that he can run the microwave?

Did it let you know that he understands and can use

locks?  Because he routinely locks me out of the house

and won't let me back in, even though he's staring at me through the door and giggling.

Your test shows nothing of my child. 

It shows only what he wouldn't do for you."

 

She was NOT pleased with my answer.

Her face got all red and pinched and she gathered

up her papers and left ~ fairly quickly.

 

Kyle ~ like the rest of our family ~

has never taken too kindly to being told what to do.

If it's not his idea, he will consider it,

and likely not do it.

He's not apologetic about it either.

 

The point I'm trying to make is that I believe in his ability.

I see ability that others don't want to see.

The Special Needs pre-school was good for Kyle.

We fought to have him in our neighborhood school with his peers for Kindergarten and it was a rough year, because none of the school staff believed he should be there.

And then we moved. 

It was like coming out of a dark tunnel into bright sunlight.

Not only was he welcomed in the typical classroom,

he was wanted, and supports were put in place,

friendships were made.

He thrived.

 

Whether those around you believe in your child or not.

Don't you ever stop seeing his/her abilities

and possibilities.

Follow dreams.

Encourage inclusion.

Foster friendships.

In every child...

Believe.

Exclusive Club

 

Having a child with Down syndrome admits you to an exclusive club, where meeting other individuals and families living with Down syndrome

means you never truly meet a stranger.

You have and immediate bond.

You have an immediate interest.

 

This is a club,

that I didn't want to join,

at first.

However, my life has been changed,

enhanced, improved and energized, by the

opportunities and people that have

entered my life because of

this amazing journey we are on together.

 

When we first received the pre-natal diagnosis

of Down syndrome,

the amazing people of the Utah Down Syndrome Foundation,

made sure we had information,

access to support,

and visits from those who had lived

what we were now experiencing.

 

The following was included in the packet we received.

"Welcome to Holland"

http://ndsccenter.org/resources/new-and-expectant-parents/welcome-to-holland/

I included this as a link,

this site has permission to reprint this...and I do not.

This is the best explanation of what life is like.

I hope you enjoy reading it,

and I hope it brings understanding

~ if you aren't living with disability ~

and comfort if you are.

 

Down syndrome has opened our eyes.

Broadened our relationships,

and brought the most incredible

people into our lives.

The most amazing and incredible

being our Kyle.

An Advocate

I did not realize, when Kyle came into our lives,

that I would gain an understanding

of what an advocate is,

and what an advocate does.

 

An ADVOCATE,

is someone who does something

for someone who can not do it for themselves.

Or,

one who pleads another's cause.

 

As an advocate for our son,

I have learned to speak up for what he needs.

To demand services that will enhance his life and abilities.

I have, at times, been his voice.

 

Kyle has "functional communication" skills,

but is non-verbal.

 

What does that mean?

Kyle can and does type on his iPhone or iPad things he wants or needs.

He can, through gesture and a few intelligible words,

get his meaning across.

But to those who don't know him,

(and to some who do)

most of what he says is un-intelligible.

This is his greatest delay.

This is his greatest frustration.

Sometimes it is my frustration too.

The "hubby" likes to say,

"It's like talking to a foreigner."

It really, kinda is.

He has things to say.

Feelings to convey.

I have learned to be his voice.

I have learned to love him more,

appreciate him more as I have been his advocate.

 

I have come to understand,

in the smallest way,

how the Savior of mankind,

even Jesus Christ,

is our Advocate with the Father.

 

In 1 John 2:1

we read,

"My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not.  And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous."

 

Jesus Christ

did for each of us

that which we could not do for ourselves.

He paid for our sins

and allows us to repent.

He pleads our cause with the Father.

 

My little ability to advocate for our son,

has given me a greater appreciation for the Savior,

who advocates for me and you.

I have a greater love for my Savior.

And I feel the love He has for me.

 

My life is richer and more abundant

because I have the grand opportunity

to love, nurture and advocate

for one of God's

great spirits.

Our son is also His son

and I am blessed to be his

advocate and his Mother!

People First Language

What is

"People First Language"?

 

When you think about it, it makes tons of sense.

You don't say,

"That cute little glasses girl."

~ No ~

You say,

"That cute little girl with glasses."

 

You put the person first.

 

You wouldn't say,

"That wart on the nose guy."

~ No ~

You'd say,

"That guy, with the wart on his nose."

And why would you point out the wart on someone's nose anyway? 

Is that all you see?

Is that all about that person worthy of notice?

 

In the same way,

You don't say,

"That little Downs boy."

~ No ~

You say,

"That little boy with Down syndrome." 

 

The person comes first.

 

I understand that we all use words to describe other people.

But are the words we use as descriptors,

all we see of the person? 

 

Think about it,

how do people describe you?

I'm sure each of us would like to be put first,

before one of our characteristics.

 

Try to see past the words used to describe another,

see the person,

and in using your words,

Put the Person first.

 

Thank you.

Resources

As with anything you need or want information about,

there are a lot of resources about Down syndrome.

 

 

In the Down syndrome community -- most of these

are known by their acronym.

I will give both.

Some are U.S. national organizations,

some are state organizations that I know about or have been affiliated with, and feel I can recommend them to you for information and/or to get involved.

This is not a comprehensive list, and I know that most

U.S. States have organizations to give aid and support.

 

 

National Down Syndrome Society

NDSS

http://www.ndss.org/

 

 

National Down Syndrome Congress

NDSC

http://ndsccenter.org/

 

 

Utah Down Syndrome Foundation

UDSF

http://www.udsf.org/

 

 

Down Syndrome Community

http://downsyndromecommunity.org/

This is the Puget Sound Down Syndrome Community

 

 

International Down Syndrome Coalition

IDSC

http://www.theidsc.org/

 

 

All of these organizations have accurate and available information.

All of these organizations can be found on Facebook also.

 

Happy Down Syndrome Awareness Month!

Wisdom on Wednesday

"The measure of a man's life is in how well he strives to overcome his personal handicaps, his God allowed opposition.  Neither his temporary failures nor life's unfair tragedies, and especially not his death, however untimely it seems, negates the value of his personal triumphs.  They will go on forever ~ for him, for those who love him, and for all who follow after."

"Chester I Love You"

By Blaine & Brenton Yorgason

 

 

 

We all have God given opposition.

Some are weaknesses.

Some are excruciating trials.

Sometimes we have both.

All of our God given opposition

~ I love that phrase ~

makes us who we are,

and allows us to grow.

 

For Kyle,

some of his God given opposition is highly visible.

Every milestone,

every step forward,

every VICTORY is celebrated.

 

It should be so for all of us.

We all have battles we are fighting,

and every step forward,

every victory,

should acknowledged and celebrated.

 

We all have opposition.

We all have something in our lives that make us different.

So be tender and kind with yourself,

and with those around you.

Everyone has battles to fight.

 

"The measure of a man's life is in how well he strives to overcome his personal handicaps, his God allowed opposition...."

Awareness Month

October is Awareness Month.

I'm sure that most other months have many organizations for which awareness are commemorated.

October has two which are particularly close to my heart,

along with at least 112 besides!

 

Some of them are:

Bat Appreciation Month

Church Library Month

Domestic Violence Awareness

Go Hog Wild ~ Eat Country Ham

National Bake & Decorate Month

National Chili, Cookie, Popcorn Poppin',

Pear, Pineapple and Pizza

(not in that exact order ~ and I lumped them together)

Rett Syndrome Awareness Month

Right Brainers Rule! Month

Squirrel Awareness Month

(Different than Squirrel Appreciation Day in January)

World Menopause Month

 

But the two I most particularly want to mention have both had an impact on my life and the life of my family.

 

Breast Cancer Awareness

 

Breast cancer has touched my family several times.  And though the  battle was fought long and hard, ultimately the battle was lost.

 

Ladies, get your mammograms ~ get them annually,

get them religiously.

Don't hide from possibilities. 

Take action!

Be your own best friend,

take care of yourself.

 

 

Down Syndrome Awareness

 

Down syndrome entered our lives, twenty~five and a half years ago, when my nephew, Drew, a fraternal twin, was born with Down syndrome. 

And again, nineteen years ago when our youngest son,

~ let's call him, Kyle ~

oh, wait, that's his name...

let's call him, Kyle anyway ~

was born with Down syndrome.

 

Because of prenatal testing we knew that Kyle would be born with Down syndrome.

But exactly what is Down syndrome and what does it mean for the individual who has Down syndrome?

 

• Down syndrome is the most commonly occurring chromosomal condition.
• One in 691 babies in the United States is born with Down syndrome.
• Down syndrome occurs when an individual has a full or partial extra copy of chromosome 21.  This additional genetic material alters the course of development and cause the characteristics associated with Down syndrome.
• There are three types of Down syndrome:  trisomy 21~accounts for 95% of cases, translocation accounts for about 4% and mosaicism 1%.
• Down syndrome occurs in people of all races and economic levels.
• A few of the common physical traits of Down syndrome are low muscle tone, small stature, and upward slant to the eyes, and a single deep crease across the center of the palm.
• Every person with Down syndrome is a unique individual and may possess these characteristics to a different degree or not at all.
• People with Down syndrome have an increased risk for certain medical conditions.
• People with Down syndrome attend school, work, participate in decisions that affect them, and contribute to society in many ways.
• All people with Down syndrome experience cognitive delays, but the effect is usually mild to moderate and is not indicative of the many strengths and talents that each individual possesses.

How has Down syndrome affected our family?

How has Down syndrome affected me?

What should you know about a person with Down syndrome?

 

All these, and much, much more will be to topics in the coming month.

So, sit back, buckle your seat belt and come along on a ride of

Down syndrome awareness.

Kyle

One year old

One of my all time favorite photos.

Kyle and Drew

2013